Tag: Soul Intent Arts

Hotel Phillips and Murderous Insomnia

Every year for Samhain I publish accounts of my more charged, and in some cases creepy, spiritual pursuits. The Dead Time is a treasured journey to Solstice, and as it is a time of untime, the shadowed season presents a great opportunity to tell the stories that many who do shamanic work won’t tell–the occasions when things don’t go well or the unseen presents itself unexpectedly. You may recognize some of these accounts from my previous stories, while others are more recent. Enjoy the solitude of the darkness, and know the light will soon warm!

Hotel Phillips - Photo by hotelphillips.comEarly Spring of 2002 I had the fortune of spending a week at the beautiful Hotel Phillips in Kansas City, Missouri, while on a business trip. I am quite used to loads of spirit traffic when I stay in hotels; however, my stay at Hotel Phillips offered a bit more than the luxury experience the lush establishment touts. From the first night that I checked into room 1513, I sensed many presences–again, not unusual at all, as I do quite a bit of psychopomp work. Staying in hotels for me is like being tapped on the shoulder constantly, far from restful, and Hotel Phillips was no different. Upon checking into their room, other people hang up their clothes first thing. I create sacred space and release errant energies, a gesture part compassion and part hopeful of a solid night’s sleep.

One presence in particular stood out right away, a female whose only visual aspect was a white lace hem that I saw close to the floor. I saw “her” in my room and hall several times the first few days that I was there, though she would not allow me to feel her. What was odd about this spirit was when I offered to release her she did not want to go. I also got a sense with this presence more than any of the others that she had indeed died in the building, and needed friendly company. Regardless, I couldn’t sleep in the room. She was not particularly bothersome or ever present, but her air of unrest was contagious.

Thursday morning I got up, showered, and was drying my hair in the bathroom when I felt that I was not alone. The feminine presence was with me. I opened the bathroom door to find a distraught woman standing there. She was about 22-25 years old with long auburn curly hair, a Caucasian woman in a rather formal 1930s style dress. Her white hem fell just above her ankles—the garment I had been seeing all week. As I gazed upward I saw a large bloody wound in her chest, which dripped blood and tissue onto the floor. She had been shot and was experiencing the panic of her death moment before me.

I stepped out of the bathroom and through her, as she stepped to the side of my bed. I did not learn her name, but I felt a strong sense of betrayal, that she had become involved with a man and the relationship could not for whatever reason come to fruition. This man is who shot her. I often learn information around the cause of death, and it’s always fascinating. Staying true to my role as psychopomp means that details are mere curiosities. The only real objective in working with the dead is to learn how I can facilitate helping them move on to the next phase of their destiny, and doing just that. Everything else is superfluous. That said, sometimes learning what I must from them and helping them shift is no easy feat.

I asked her if she wanted to move on, and she hesitated. I told her that she would not have fully shown herself to me if she did not want help and asked her what held her here. My sense was that she was waiting for the man who killed her–her lover–to somehow redeem himself. I told her that she may have a long wait, that she had already had a long wait, and that she could wait for him to make amends in a much better place than this hotel. After a bit more discussion, she allowed me to walk her into Spirit space and all was restful.

I went on to work for the day, but from the minute I entered the room that night, I was uneasy. The oppressive feel of the room was worse than it had been since my arrival, and I realized that whoever was there was angry at me, yet the spirit refused to communicate.

Once in bed, the lights were out for about two minutes when I began to hear extremely loud scuffling noises moving around the room. I lay there and listened for a few seconds, when finally the sound reached a crescendo behind my headboard forming a complete circle around me. The entity meant to frighten, if not threaten me. Though difficult to describe, there was palpable movement in the discordant sound and it pushed against my ribs. Non-consensual physical contact from spirits is an extremely disturbing phenomenon. When an encounter reaches that point fear becomes anger.

Enraged, I observed a male in the room, about four feet from the foot of my bed. Although well-dressed he was surrounded by black clouds. He, too, was Caucasian, though physically did not appear entirely human. I knew this man was the killer, and that he had killed many times. He was a nasty piece of work, and he was angry at me for interacting with the woman. He had killed her in the hotel, though not in that room, and he had never been linked to the crime. His pride was wounded that I knew what had happened, as he was used to getting away with everything. I had seen his dirty deeds and he wanted to eliminate me as a threat. He was afraid that I would hand him over to some authority for punishment. He was so stuck in a defensive consciousness that he didn’t seem to realize that he was dead.

Real Wyrd - A Modern Shaman's Roots in the Middle World by S. Kelley HarrellI told him that I didn’t care what he had done in his life, that I wasn’t there to judge him. Gradually his energy softened. The noise in the room stopped. I said that this was not the place he needed to be anymore, that whatever happened between him and the woman was between them, and if he felt ready to deal with that from a more useful place that I could help him. I also made it perfectly clear that I was ready to sleep and we would not be negotiating all night. When I said that to him, the clouds around him began to dissipate, but I still did not see him clearly. I held the space for a good 45 minutes or so, but he went relatively easily. For the first time since I checked into Hotel Phillips my room was quiet on all fronts.

The next morning I approached the concierge, asking if anyone had ever reported anything strange about room 1513. He, along with the staff at the front desk, went pale and asked me what had happened. When I told them that I saw a woman in my room, they stammered a bit, eventually going on to say that they had not had reports about that room, and had not had anything reported at all since the hotel had re-opened after renovations the previous Fall. They offered to assign me to a different room, and when I declined huddled in the corner whispering. Clearly they were aware of creepy occurrences, but I couldn’t tell if they would be relieved or disappointed to learn that their gangster spectre was no longer a guest.

Read more spooky stories in “Real Wyrd – A Modern Shaman’s Roots in the Middle World,” my collection of true paranormal experiences as a lifelong intuitive.

Also, read the 2014 followup to this encounter.

Phone Calls from Beyond

I have been receiving restricted phone calls that are not normal. My cell will ring once, maybe twice and when I answer there is this strange static. The phone calls have been happening only when I am sleeping. Today however I received calls while at work. I truly believe someone is trying to contact me or tell me something. I am not sure if it is my guide or my parents that have passed away in the last few years. Is there someway for me to figure out what and who these calls are about? I am both curious and tired. Thanks ~A

Thank you for your note, A. When I ask for the spirit of who is making these calls to come I am greeted by a matronly woman. She appears to be in her mid fifties, has curly, dark blond hair, and is wearing a navy blue printed dress that is somewhat out of date–late 70s, early 80s. She has a very maternal feel about her but she tells me that she is not your mother. What troubles me about her is that she is constantly wringing her hands and her face is lined with worry. Other aspects of her form tell me that she is deceased and that she was murdered. She was never given a proper burial. Her body was more or less dumped and buried in a shallow grave under a tree in a very boggy area a few decades ago.

When I sit with her I realize that she will not be able to speak without fear until some healing is done for her. When that healing is completed she tells me that at the time of her death she had a daughter that was 7-8. She was killed by the daughter’s father. My feeling is that she was pregnant when she was killed, and that pregnancy was the reason she was murdered, even though she child feels to have been her husband’s. I learn no other specifics about her death.

I asked her how she was connected to you and her reason for contacting you. She indicated that she was attracted to you through your wonderful relationship with your daughter and because you have a very kind heart. I do not have a sense that you knew her in life, in fact, I feel that she is connected to the area where you currently live–not necessarily your exact house, but that community, that land. I also feel very clearly that the husband’s crime was never found out and that the mother was concerned for her daughter unknowingly in contact with her mother’s killer. The daughter is not in physical danger, in fact the father is quite elderly now, if not dead, himself.

It seems that this mother saw you as someone who could understand her pain, and someone she wanted to help her move on. The fact that you realized something besides a technical glitch was happening is an indication of your own awareness and potential ability as a deathwalker. If you have ever had any inclination to develop your own intuitive skills, it would seem there’s plenty of support for you to do so. Be well, A!

What is a Shaman? What Can a Shaman Do for Me?

I’ve observed that the Universe seems to send out memos on topics, as I will go ages without an inquiry about a particular theme then receive several at once. Over the last couple of weeks I’ve encountered people curious about shamanism. On the whole people do not stumble into shamanism, whether that is feeling led to study it or to receive shamanic healing. Even in the world of energy work and holistic medicine shamanism still seems to elude many. In hopes of addressing this spiritual curiosity I am reworking a hand out I give to new clients, information that is also on my website. That information is: What is a shaman? What can a shaman do for me?

There are all kinds of academic, even poetic explanations of what shamans are and what they do. In fact, a very detailed FAQ on shamanism can be found at various locations on the web. Detail or no, the questions from most people are, “What is a shaman? What can a shaman do for me?”

Siberian Shaman, Lake Baikal

Siberian Shaman, Lake Baikal

A shaman can help you heal whatever you are open to healing. Shamans are intermediaries with the spirit world, not just links to the spirits but explorers of the spirit realm, itself. “Aren’t we all?” you ask. Yes, we all have the potential to be, though not all of us readily know how. We are not all active participants in the worlds within and around us, though we all have the ability to be.

Shamanism is not a religion; rather, it is a perspective entailing that everything is alive. A base shamanic view holds that everything, everything has a soul, and is connected to every creature and energy. Through that connection we are able to travel out of our bodies beyond our egos to communicate with souls of the dead, ourselves and other humans; plants, animals, Earth, the elements; even “higher” spirits, such as guides, helpers, our own High Selves, and our Higher Power. How shamans accomplish this act is perhaps most telling, and most individual.

There are some basic tenets of shamanism that pervade ancient, indigenous cultures, and neoshamanic practice such as we all have animal guides and spirit guides; the concept of soul retrieval; extracting an illness or entity from the body for physical, emotional, mental or spiritual healing; psychopomp work, or death walking–guiding the dead to Spirit; and divination. Beyond the basic functions a shaman performs the similarities across cultures largely stop there. Shamanic cultures are diverse, as every cultural history records a social role of a person performing some facet of the role of shaman. Called medicine men, wise women, skywalkers, nagual, and many more titles and roles, today the purpose of the shaman is no different. Neoshamanic work draws on these same primary tenets creating many outlets for learning indigenous and contemporary shamanic practices for daily life.

Given the range of techniques shamans use, it’s important to understand how these skills apply to everyday life. In the most broad perspective, shamans promote healing. Opening communication with the spirit realm can open you to your own healing ability, body, mind, soul, and emotion. Bear in mind that no shaman, doctor, surgery, or medication can heal you. You heal yourself. You make the conscious decision to allow whatever healing modality you receive to actually heal you. Healing is your personal agreement between yourself and Spirit. Know that when you interact in the journey state, which is the theta brain wave level of deep cognizant deep dreaming, you are in the space to directly access yourself at the central levels of being. You can reshape your physical and spiritual DNA, taking command of the creative ability with which Spirit blessed you. With shamanic healing you are an active participant in your wellbeing. Through understanding your ability to co-create your own life with Spirit, you not only improve your own quality of life, but that of All Life.



What a shaman can do for you depends on your reasons for seeking one. Perhaps you have a chronic illness that doesn’t seem to abate. Perhaps you are depressed, or want to be rid of a disruptive pattern, relationship, belief, or habit in your life. Perhaps you feel you have unlimited potential, but can’t seem to manifest it into what you need in your life. Perhaps you just want to find meaning in your life, or want insight into your own abilities. Maybe you want to meet your spirit guides. The reunion with your guides can help in each of those things, as well as the reunion with your High Self. Remembering these relationships allows you to reconnect to Spirit, empowering you, and giving you intimate knowledge of your own strengths, abilities, and love. You will never feel alone again once you have remembered your spiritual allies.

Additional work could also help, such as a soul retrieval, in which spirit aspects that left due to trauma are returned and integrated, allowed to heal and age to your current maturity. In some cases soul aspects aren’t returned to the Earth consciousness but move on to Spirit. The effects of this technique usually include ending the pattern of chronic illness, depression, or other pattern that you have become locked into. In some cases, memories are returned, and certainly abilities that you may have missed as you have aged.

Another way to specifically address patterns, thoughts, or habits that have become harmful, such as addiction, obsessive behaviour, a disruptive relationship dynamic, or even chronic illness is life regression and progression. Often seeing the origin of these patterns helps one to clear them, as well as talking with a future self to see the healing as it has manifest and carried through one’s life.

In some cases, an extraction of an intruding entity is needed to release a pattern or offending condition. Some refer to this as depossession or exorcism, though it is rarely theatrical as it is depicted in fiction. It is, however, quite profound. In the most base terms such interferences are merely energy that is no longer functional in its current place. Symptoms of this may be physical issues, radical shifts in mood or temperament, an imbalance of power in a relationship. When the energy is removed and health flow to the etheric form restored the flow balance on all levels can be better maintained.

DIY Totemism

DIY Totemism

Another way to bring about balanced flow in your life force is a technique called “dismemberment”. In this technique, your animal guide is asked to do the dismemberment, and allowed to completely destroy your physical body. The animal may “re-member” you immediately after, or it may recommend that you take time in this re-membering. The end result is your body fully re-membered, without the affliction. It is new.

These are just a few of the techniques shamans use, and only a vague description of the reasons that you may feel led to a shaman. Wildspeak is a great resource of articles on shamanism, animism and a quite extensive animal totem dictionary. As well, for insight into working with helping spirits, Lupa’s DIY Totemism: Your Personal Guide to Animal Totems is brilliant.

Gift of the Dreamtime

Gift of the Dreamtime

My book, Gift of the Dreamtime: Awakening to the Divinity of Trauma gives a thorough presentation of shamanic healing in a useable modern context and may be very helpful in determining if shamanic work is appropriate for you.

I wish you deep healing and prolific power!

The Necessity of Honoring Spiritual Unity

Thanks for your help Kelley. Why do my husband and I have such a hard time together? Divorce is not an option. Thanks, L.

Thanks for your note, L. When I rise up into soul space and look down at how the two of you are energetically connected that life force is very thin and dim. That tells me that that neither of you has lived in spiritual recognition of each other. The marriage, roles of partners, etc., have been honored, but making the spiritual observation and connection to each other has gone without nurture. The relevance of soul relationship hasn’t been an emphasized aspect of your marriage, but it still can be. The connection is there. I realize that may be challenging to do after you have been with someone for a long time. It’s more challenging to allow yourself to see that person in a new light, to commit to yourself to allow your existing relationship to be the one you want. This bond can be fostered by giving it attention daily, if not more often. The same way that you hold up things in prayer, give energy to world peace, make daily affirmations, send Reiki to someone, or manifest personal goals must be the level that you reverence your soul bond with your husband. It has to become part of your regular way that you interact with your own soulful nature. I believe that it is perhaps a smoother transition to make when all parties involved are practicing this spiritual reverence together, particularly if you communicate about it, but both do not have to do it for positive change to occur. Exploring Tantric connection could be very useful, and it may be a more acceptable avenue for such work for your husband. One facet of this for you both is learning to voice your bond to each other, and not through rote “I love you,” or other passive gestures. Speaking your truth is critical to the success of any relationship. My sense is that the friction between you will abate radically when the soul bond is given some attention.

I realize that you are not seeking challenging transition, whether that is through divorce or in revitalizing your marriage. I also realize that you are not seeking change, though if you want things to change challenging transition is unavoidable. Even if you do not feel that you can give to your marriage on a spiritual level, it would be very beneficial to you to do some energy work to soothe your own sense of struggle and loss around that, and if you feel led, to work with a therapist in finding your voice.

I wish you the deepest, most soulful love.

Soul Twins, Soulmates, Twin Flames and Rigid Truth

“The truth you believe and cling to makes you unavailable to hear anything new.” ~Pema Chödrön, The Wisdom of No Escape and the Path of Loving Kindness

The Post-Traumatic Stress of Maternal Awakening by S. Kelley HarrellI recently featured Chödrön’s quote as my Twitter update while I was penning a response to a client regarding soulmates. The two seemed so related that the quote is fitting to introduce this collective inquiry: What are soulmates and why do we seek them?

Most of us have been given some concept of soul connection by early childhood, a definition that sticks with us unless or until we explore the concept ourselves. When I first began working with others as a shaman a large number of my clients were dealing with some aspect of ‘soulmate,’ whether it was the search to find one or clarifying an existing relationship with a soul relation. The thing that I noticed most was how desperately many cling to the concept of ‘soulmate’ and to the people they believe to be such. I was curious about what led people to believe that soulmate = perfect union, that having a soul connection to someone would entail staying in a relationship that clearly did not meet needs. Equally, I was driven to understand the psychology that feels it’s useless unless it is in a recognizable soul union.

Examining how the concept of ‘soul relationship’ is put out there one quickly bumps into Edgar Cayce’s work around the topics of “soul twins” and “twin flames.” Having been widely interpreted, the perspective largely perpetuated through his readings is that there is one and only one perfect soul complement. In this view the soul is a dual-faceted entity that splits itself in two equal masculine and feminine life forces in order to bridge a wider terrain of experience and learning in the earth plane. These two come together in formed life to complete the Oversoul’s (or High Self’s) earthly work. I’m comfortable that Cayce knew things that I don’t, though within the framework of my experience is a truth that souls are limitless. Not only are they infinite, they are collectives spanning distance and time, perhaps even dimensions, doing acrobatic energetic feats, splitting into many manifestations and rejoining so cleverly we can’t begin to hold them in linear understanding. This is the beauty of our transpersonal. It isn’t just metaphor that we are all connected regardless of the era we were born, the location in which we reside, the biological sex we wear, or the species we inhabit. We are connected, period.

I’ve had many clients come to me who realized they were in a soul-connected relationship only to find that interpersonal issues weren’t resolved by virtue of this spirit union. Most couldn’t understand how a precious soulmate could inflict harm on its Other. The reality is being connected at very high levels to someone doesn’t automatically impart that the earth consciousness is well-adjusted. In fact, it doesn’t imply anything. Unfulfilled expectations are the result of earthly filters we have applied to a spiritual state of being. In that state several of my clients expressed that they felt they had been given a divine gift and to walk away from it would be a dismissal of their Higher Power. More harrowing for some was the idea that in leaving this soulmate they would karmically forfeit finding another. Changing this belief isn’t just leaving a lover or spouse but is a crisis of faith much the same as realizing one’s chosen religion no longer suffices. For many to turn away from a soulmate, even in extremely abusive situations it feels like going against Nature because we have been programmed to view soul connections through a limited earthly lens. In some cases we have been indoctrinated to put our interpretation of those filters above our own welfare and needs. That inclination is as harmful in unhealthy soulmate relationships as it is insidious in those who feel they have no self-worth without one.

In that light it isn’t the soul connection that is damaging; rather, the way we have been taught to perceive it is. Soul connection at its most basic isn’t about how many we have or how long they last. The soul doesn’t know male or female, or loving one versus loving five, or romantic versus platonic love. It doesn’t even differentiate cat from tree, or son from place. The soul does not know time. All it knows is fluid, expanding compassion and unconditional love for All Things. When we start applying linear constructs to soul connections and spiritual experiences, the experiences become stagnant. Any thriving wisdom they imparted ceases to evolve and grow.

The Celtic concept of “anam cara” is the most fluid understanding of soul bonding that I’ve learned, the “soul friend,” one who simply by being in form reminds us of infinite connection and moves us in the way of growth when we won’t move ourselves. For that reason soulful bonds often create more challenges for us, rather than less. What I see in that dynamic is our power to create ourselves exactly as we want to be in as many ways as we can comprehend. Within that open comprehension and bond with All That Is, would it not be possible to see anyone as a soulmate, if we allowed it?

We live at a time that the rules for how we come into this plane are changing, if they ever were truly static. Perhaps it is our ability to widen our comprehension of the rules that has changed. Years ago a friend said to me, “When you find truth, pick it up. Inspect it carefully, then put it down and walk away.” Truth, like souls, cannot be held. My outlook has been more fluid since I learned this. I have become my metaphor, and in doing so recognize you more freely.

The Power of Moving On

Hi Kelley, My husband and I have been apart since 2004 and I still have no resolution. We have not talked other than him telling me that he will make my life a living hell, and he has done so. He is planning on marrying the woman he left me for in 2010. I still see him on the highway on my way to work. That man was my heart. What happened to make him hate me so? Thanks ~L

Thanks for your note, L. I can’t get core insight about your husband without his permission. I can tell you that from the imagery I see he felt for a long time like a starving, impoverished person, though the circumstances of his despair were self-induced. He is on his own path of creating conflict for himself as a means of learning self-reliance and empowerment. As he treats himself without care, it is no surprise that he would treat you with even less. Consider it beneficial not to be with him any longer, in that regard. How he cares for himself is his choice and his process for this time.

What concerns me is your process. There is great danger in staying locked in a victim mindset over circumstances you can’t change, instead of focusing on the things you can change that will benefit from your attention. It seems that you are steadily giving away your power to many others, leaving little for yourself. Put yourself first. You need to care for and raise your life force now more than ever. If you do not have a regular meditative practice, even if it is visualizing random colors of light moving through and around your body, such will improve your health and your outlook. Finding an energy worker to help you raise your life force–a Reiki master, shaman, holotropic breathwork practitioner… will vastly help you heal your life force, your body, and your heart.

The Renegade’s Guide to snoring

Kelley–I don’t know if this is particularly shamanic, but I’m an avid dreamer, though rarely can I figure out what my dreams mean. Can you recommend a good guide to dream analysis? Thanks! Compass-less.

Thanks for your note, C. One of my first observations that I was on a different path was in the depths of my dream world. I’ve always been a vivid and lucid dreamer. Recommend a good guide? Sort of. There are two excellent resources for interpreting dreams. The first lies in cultivating the bridge between your conscious and unconscious minds. Dreams can be many things–a mirror of yourself, messages from your unconscious, messages from your body, travels out to/memories of other planes/experiences of yourself, messages from other beings, or visits from other beings. Sometimes a dream is a combination of these. My general approach to decoding my dreams and those of my clients falls mostly in that order. First I determine if the dream was coming from me or another consciousness (Yes, I know, ultimately we’re all one consciousness, but in order to comprehend metaphors and symbols they must be filtered through a coherent legend, which resides in your unique unconscious/conscious mind connection.). Most people who dream prolifically seem to have their own measure for determining the origin of the dream. Myself, I just know. Dreams that don’t come from me feel foreign, to put it simply. The quickest test I can suggest for this determination is to ask your High Self to step into your conscious mind and pose the question, “Did this dream originate from me or from a separate consciousness?” Go with the immediate answer you get, whatever fashion that answer comes in. Depending on that response I go in different directions. If it was my unconscious communicating with me, I consider how the personalities and symbols in the dream are a mirror of myself. By that I mean, I assume that everything in the dream was really me, even if the figures in the dream are other people that I know. From there I break down the archetypes by gender, age, emotional state, physical condition, etc. Even the setting I examine archetypally to decode any message it may need to convey. Probably 80% of my dreams are facets of myself expressing needs or hurts that need to be addressed, or beliefs, habits, relationships, or thought patterns that are no longer functional in my life. By considering that everything in the dream is mirroring some aspect of myself I intercept messages from my unconscious mind or body (which has its own symbolic communication system), not only do I cognate the message, but I “write in” what that symbolism meant so that if it comes up again I have direction right off the bat. Retaining this personal meaning is where keeping a journal is invaluable. Most of the time once I unravel the meaning of a symbol, I don’t dream about it again; thus, recurrent dreams are resolved. Remember, as with all truths, what was meaningful in a certain way one time may be meaningful in a different way subsequently. Even though the symbolism may have been sound at one point in your life, allow yourself the freedom for it to mean new things later. As you grow your consciousness expands. So does how you carry and interpret archetypes.

Frequently I wander off in a dreamstate, which arguably isn’t a dream at all, but perhaps the classic “vision.” Nonetheless, it’s a particular kind of spirit journey that only occurs when I’m sleeping, so I still consider top snoring aids at emsafety.net. In these visions, I experience going out of my body, or perhaps I experience a different manifestation of myself. This could be some simultaneous life, some experience of myself from a past, or perhaps an entirely different plane of existence that I know isn’t Earth. Sometimes I visit someone in this type of dream, or I see things from an animal’s perspective. Again, distinguishing this type of dream for me is typically easy, as I am consciously aware that I’m dreaming. Some consider these journeys “lucid dreams,” in which the dreamer is observing the dream from a detached perspective while also participating in the dream, and directing its progression, to some degree. If you’re not sure if you are wandering out, the same “High Self” test as above is appropriate to do to determine if you are astrally traveling in your sleep.

Another type of dream that I think falls under the category of “vision” involves messages and visits from other consciousnesses. Once you determine that a dream did not originate from your own consciousness the task becomes one of clarifying the message. Perhaps that requires a little research and a bit more skill, very much of the shamanic sort. I find that dictionaries for dreams are one dimensional, at best. Without question I support the collective influence that archetypes and symbols have, and encourage becoming familiar with those across various cultures. However, I feel that stopping there is missing a vital reason for why the symbol visited us. In addition to collective relationships to symbols we experience personal relationships to them, and those meanings are only culled out when we consider the symbol is its own consciousness that has intelligent insight to deliver specifically to us, as individuals. While brown bear may mean protection and confidence as an archetype, to me, specifically it may also carry a message of hope and the ability to sustain through hard times. The way to create those personal bonds with symbols is through meditation and shamanic soul travel.

The second key to understanding your dreams lies in connecting with the feeling they evoke. Feelings are precisely the compass that connect the dream to your waking life. When you can clarify the way a dream left you feeling and see how that feeling manifests in current circumstances you have decoded the symbols of that dream. In that brilliant inner light you can’t get lost.

Be well, C!

Intentional Insights is a Q&A column inviting you to look inside yourself. If you have a question that you would like for me to address in my column regarding a brief Soul Reading or questions about spiritual healing and shamanism, please send them to me at Kelley at soulintentarts dot com, or contact me to schedule a full-length Soul Reading. Intentional Insights is a production of Soul Intent Arts. Follow me on Facebook and Twitter!

Coming Out Starseed

Many of us are familiar with the phrase “Starseed,” meaning those creatures from other star systems who settled into the Earth realm with many of their etheric layers functioning at high levels not common to this plane. The original writings on such beings were linear, targeting specific timeframes for birth, particular skills and demeanors. Among my clients I have worked with many Starseeds and most certainly identify as one, myself. Through the years that I’ve grown as such and interacted with others, I’ve gained gratitude for that pioneering information, as well as realized just how limited and confining it was. The bounds of people who identify as not being from here are limitless. My hope for this edition of Intentional Insights is that it expands that concept a bit, open channels for other Starseeds to reach out, and reminds us all of our infinite greatness.

It’s not easy being the fringe of the fringe, and I say that from the depths of my freaky, non-conformist heart. I can’t tell you exactly when, I can’t tell you precisely where, but I can without hesitation tell you that as soon as I became aware of myself in this plane I knew I wasn’t from here. Where else could I be from? That’s not information readily available to a little girl growing up in 1970s rural North Carolina, or many other places at that time. We didn’t have the plethora of information on Starseeds, Indigo Children, Crystal Children, that we do now. That lack of tribe shaped my spiritual growth to this day, though I readily recognize that I would not be the mindful person that I am now without my life being exactly as it has been, and I’m at peace with that.

It seems mine is a quite common experience, with many variations. How do know Starseeds know they aren’t from here? Mostly, because Grandmother Earth never felt like home. Some people very much feel they are originally from this plane and move very well within its layers. Grandmother Earth is a complex creature, home to refugees from all corners of the Void, and a sister in a much bigger family system than we have dared explore. Starseeds have memories of some other place, some other family–some of which are the birth family, some of which they’ve never encountered here. Starseeds tend to be extremely intuitive and aware of that fact. Generally we are very impatient because we recall being able to manifest what we wanted with little or no effort either before we were in form, when we were in a different form, or when we were on Earth before. Yep, that’s what I said. I personally don’t buy into past lives, not because I don’t believe we don’t have many manifestations of ourselves, but because I don’t experience that those manifestations are limited by the concept of time (I wasn’t joking about being fringe of the fringe.). My soul growth and what I’ve seen in some others who identified other star systems as home includes a strata of this plane when it was new, when it was actively being created. We might call it the time of the Gods and Goddesses of our mythology, but even that feels limiting to me. No, I can’t say that I buy into the whole Atlantean/Lemurian thing, but I do without question know there have been many elevated manifestations of humanity that our science cannot or will not affirm. We didn’t just come in a singular era. Some of us return time and again, some of us just got here. In any form, Starseeds are manifestors, though generally frustrated unless or until we master the magick of the formed realm, of which therein lies the rub. We don’t tend to get along well with the formed realm. It’s heavy, it’s dense, restrictive. The result is that a lot of us have keen body issues, if not flat out self-destructive tendencies when it comes to the form. Most Starseeds have extremely active upper chakras and are aware of their transpersonal space (sometimes to the degree of what our society considers mental illness), but are equally lacking in their lower chakras. This energetic imbalance manifests in dissociation, being spacey, depression, and many other ways. Likewise, many Starseeds are highly empathic, can read life force, talk with spirits, but can’t give you directions to the drugstore around the corner. The formed realm can be very challenging for us to traverse, such that the rules don’t make sense. We arrive at our conclusions using a different logic, not better, not worse (though often amusing) that isn’t always easily communicated with language. That density challenge often leaves a lot of Starseeds wanting out of this plane. They perpetually feel this need to go home. Key to their success here lies not in skipping this strata, but in mastering it. We can’t get Out There without going through the center of Here. Remembering that we came here of choice is the first point of Earth grounding for many Starseeds. Experiencing the lush lifescape this plane has to offer was chosen for a reason. Honing the life purpose can be a great reminder of that plan. The Starseeds who function the highest here aren’t the ones whose crown chakras are open and their third eyes are beaming into higher planes. The ones who do really well are very grounded into Earth energy. They are comfortable in this foreign home. Their chakra systems and etheric forms are fluid throughout. They are very anchored into the magick that this realm teaches so that they can allow the stellar life force within them to connect with the cosmic life force in the planet, herself. After all, Source is our common ancestor.

From the first realization that I was having a different spiritual experience on Earth, I felt isolated by people and more at home with spirits. I really began to feel the disjoint in my existence here when I committed to a shamanic path. I gave my best to honoring the teachings of Earth shamanism, as it is so neatly packaged and readily offered in our modern cultural interpretation of shamanism. I talk with animals, plants, crystals, dead people, faeries, weather, structures inhabited by spirits, inanimate objects, the spiritual manifestations of physical and mental conditions, soul parts of the living… I’ve not done it all by any means, but I’ve given the all that I know a thorough exploration, and endeavor to do so still. I love it; I feel it. But there was something capping that experience for me. Something was missing, and all I needed to find what would complete that lack was to look up. Contemporary distillations of shamanism omit what the ancients and indigenous have always known–we are all stars, and as we Starseeds have reconnected with that wisdom, intergalactic life force must be honored in our spiritual paths. I wholly marvel that there are others far better gifted than myself in the magick of this realm. They are powerful healers, teachers, shapeshifters, empaths and liaisons to a beautifully primal spiritual tradition. I celebrate our earth shaman and animists as wildly as I rejoice my own heavenly homecoming. When I honored that facet of myself, when I allowed myself conceive that my spiritual community was largely not of this place, my shamanic path gave way to a ferociously vast terrain of All. I found my path of celestial shamanism. I looked upon it and it was good.

Hi, my name is Kelley, and I’m a Starseed.

Intentional Insights is a Q&A column inviting you to look inside yourself. If you have a question that you would like for me to address in my column regarding a brief Soul Reading or questions about spiritual healing and shamanism, please send them to me at Kelley at soulintentarts dot com, or contact me to schedule a full-length Soul Reading. Intentional Insights is a production of Soul Intent Arts. Follow me on Facebook and Twitter!

Energy Imbalances and Wellbeing

Recently, I’ve been receiving a lot of inquiries based on the same topics. I take this as further validation of collective transition, and over the next few months will be responding to many of these questions collectively. Please continue to submit questions about private matters, and I will be glad to feature, those, as well. To that end, I’ve had several inquiries of late that deal with physical and psychological conditions.  Finding that each of them shares the common concern on how beliefs affect our health, I am choosing to address them in a single overview of how health conditions are viewed and approached in a shamanic context.  This response is not a template for approaching every energetic imbalance.  As there are often similarities in conditions, there are always unique differences.

There are some common beliefs around perceived poor health, the first being that the condition is “bad.”  Within the consciousness of that life form and in the spiritual consciousness, itself, there is no concept of good or bad.  The condition just is.  Demonizing states of being is like saying “trees are bad,” or “the sky is good.”  It is an attempt to create disjoint from something that is otherwise neutral.  When we call something bad our body and mind has a reaction to that statement.  Think about the terminology used to describe conditions and consider what feelings are evoked by words such as, “illness” or “sick.”  Do you feel supported when you say them?  Does saying them make you feel better?  Generally such wording only reinforces the compromised state of health, because that terminology leaves us feeling emotionally less.  When our emotions engage that determines how something influences us.  If it makes us feel happy, we feel well.  What makes us feel sad, angry, depressed, leaves us feeling sore, tired, and weak.  In that light, specifically how we feel dictates our reality, feelings being the reaction to how we think.  Casting life force into a good or bad polarity does not help the healing process.  If anything, doing so hinders it.  To that end, regarding such a condition as energy that is no longer functioning at its highest capacity in that location is more useful.  In short, it’s energy in the wrong place.  Allowing it to move to a place where it can be functional or released back to All That Is, is the focus.

Another belief that we tend to hold toward our perception of health is that the illness knows that it is harmful and is willfully creating harm.  There can be unique factors around this, but in most cases that I’ve worked with the condition did not realize that it was causing harm.  In fact, it did not even realize that it was in a non-useful place.  This isolated view of self also is frequently witnessed in depossession and in psychopomp work, and is resolved by having an open discourse with the life force on the current state of things, the effect it’s having, and one hopes, by then facilitating its movement to a more useful place.

How to Heal Toxic Thoughts by Sandra IngermanIt’s not easy to change our vocabulary or our beliefs for expressing how we feel about physical or psychological conditions.  In some cases, elaborating on how poorly we feel is socially more accepted than celebrating how great we feel.  The phrase ‘misery loves company,’ doesn’t stir strong emotions for no reason. Creating discord is a lot easier than engendering harmony, and that is no more true than in matters of wellbeing. Regardless, allow yourself a head start in changing your unconscious perspective on health.  During my recent pregnancy and postpartum I found Sandra Ingerman’s How to Heal Toxic Thoughts: Simple Tools for Personal Transformation very useful in creating a way to speak how I felt in my mind and body that alleviate them, and I highly recommend it for that purpose.  Putting new thought patterns and methods in place for how to create health will be more easily done in a state of calm.  That is not to say that it is too late to address these when feeling compromised.  We are always ready to begin, and we’re always ready to feel well.

Intentional Insights is a Q&A column inviting you to look inside yourself. If you have a question that you would like for me to address in my column regarding a brief Soul Reading or questions about spiritual healing and shamanism, please send them to me at Kelley at soulintentarts dot com, or contact me to schedule a full-length Soul Reading.

PTSD, Etheric Trauma, and Karma

Namasté Kelley.

I have had a series of traumas, including being molested and raped in the past, and an extremely violent first marriage when I was sixteen. I was later held hostage and lingered near death and was raped. I experienced a shamanic death then and have been clean and sober for almost a year. I am now forty-six, have a wonderful therapist, good friends in AA, and my fiancé does his best to support me. I struggle with physical PTSD symptoms, depression and just trying to find my path through this while keeping an open heart and not feeling vengeful, not living as a victim. Do you have any insights that can help me find my balance? Leanna S.

Hi Leanna.

The initial thing I am told about your present life is that you have released a lot of karmic “congestion” in this manifestation of yourself, some of which wasn’t just yours. I see an etheric representation of you experiencing a vortex in your solar plexus that was the result of a dire wound. I do not know the source of the wound exactly, but it feels to have been inflicted suddenly, without warning in an experience of yourself that was not in a body but was completely etheric and at a higher expression of yourself than your earth consciousness. That wound became a sort of doorway for very traumatic things to pass through, any traumatic experiences and wounds belonging to whomever needed release, as well as collective trauma. I don’t feel that you have carried these random events around with you in this life but the imprint of them, the extremely wrenching vibration of them has been what you have carried. It’s a Like Attracts Like situation and not necessarily something you have been aware of until the events of this life—which were also working on the Like attraction principle. The shamanic awakening was the point at which you realized you did not need to stay in that vibration anymore and shifted your energy. That has allowed many painful dynamics in your life to stop effortlessly, though other dynamics did require some psychological expansion so that you could take the wisdom from them and incorporate it into your earth consciousness. What you are left with at this point is the emotional re-experiencing of these lost traumas that were not all yours, which directly correlates to the PTSD.

In part, knowing that they were not all your tragedies will create some automatic release of the emotions. The other part is realizing that while extremely difficult it was a needful act for yourself and others. That energy needed to be transmuted and you did it. You do not need to do it that way any longer, however. For you to try to would be unhealthy. The chemical use in your past is related to having still held this frequency of energy and attempting to transmute it through your solar plexus. Attempting to do this took you out of your body a great deal and the chemicals helped you smooth the transition back in. You don’t need chemicals to facilitate that shift anymore. You are in a body now. You function at an entirely different level; thus, you have a completely new range of skills at your disposal to move energy. You do, however, still carry the ability to help others heal great traumas, as you probably already know. I see a theta healing approach or some similar healing that is done on the higher aspects of beings, more so than at the earthly conscious level, is a strong skill for you. I think it would be helpful for you, as well, in soothing your physical concerns. There are great teachers of theta healing should you feel led in that direction as a practitioner.

You’ve come a long way, Leanna. Enjoy a greater peace on this next part of your journey.

Podcast 3 ~ Intentional Insights: Q&A From Within, PTSD, Etheric Trauma, and Karma